A question that often arises is if it’s normal when a massage therapist touches the intimate parts during a massage session. That is, touches or works with either the genitals, internal reproductive organs, or zones of the body that are deemed of an erogenous nature.
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One would perhaps intuitively say “No, that’s not okay,” but the reality is somewhat more complicated. There are several factors to it and we’ll give it a try to cover those in this article.
First of all, it’s perfectly normal when genital touch is done with consent (permission or agreement) of both parties: the client and the massage practitioner. It usually means that this is talked about beforehand, before the massage session starts. In fact, there are various reasons why intimate work may be a normal (or even necessary) part of a treatment.
For instance, the massage treatment may be intrinsically of a sensual erotic or spiritual-sexual nature, such being the case in Nuru Massage, Tantric Lingam Massage, or Taoist Erotic Massage, to give some examples. Treatments may also have a therapeutic goal, like resolving sexual or reproductive disorders or sexual trauma, such as may be the case in Prostate Massage, Karsai Nei Tsang, Yoni Mapping, Sexological Bodywork, Yok Thong Uterus Massage, or Genital De-Armouring.
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Secondly, there are massage modalities (which are not erotic at all or don’t aim at sexual healing) that may include working with some of the erogenous zones or parts of the body that the clients may find (too) intimate, and hence the massage therapist would point this out and ask for consent. A client may then agree or not agree to it. Think of abdominal massages, certain beauty treatments (scrubs, peeling, Lymphatic Massage, etc.) or massages that work deep in the pelvic region, or carry out work in or near the groins or with the buttocks.
Then it might also happen that during a session the genitals are “in the way” and need to be moved to another “location” so that the masseur can continue their work. This is an interesting aspect, because, for instance, my experience in Thailand is that masseurs sometimes would simply “replace” your penis to the left or right side of your body to be able to massage the groin or upper thigh, without even blinking an eye. This would be part of a regular Thai Massage, by the way.
Of course, in the West the above would be an unacceptable practice and the masseur would ask their client to “relocate” their parts by themselves or they would just skip massaging the body part that is inaccessible or obstructed. Hence, the conclusion is that touching the genitals may be “normal” or by contrast “not-done” depending on the cultural context and the intention of touch. I think that this is something to take into account when having a massage in another country or within another cultural setting.
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At any rate, the most important thing when it comes to erogenous, intimate, or genital touch in massage treatments is that it’s the role of a massage therapist to inform their client before the actual session if any of this is or may be involved in the session, and explicitly ask clients if they would be okay with it or not. That is, the question of consent is of absolute necessity to avoid embarrassing, unwanted, or traumatic situations for both the client and practitioner.
Mind that even if clients willingly and consciously opt for a Genital Massage, either for pleasure or for healing, the therapist should explain to them beforehand what exactly will be done and to what degree.
For instance, giving acupressure on the penis or vulva is of an intimate nature, but still quite something else than sensually massaging the penis or clitoris and inducing a sexual orgasm. That is, a client is always entitled to and should absolutely know and agree upon what will be the case. Any other scenario, that is, unexpected or non-consensual genital or erogenous touch in a massage session (apart maybe from culturally agreed upon practices) is simply not okay at all.
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